Self,
Cookies will not make you skinny.
Exercise only works if you actually reduce or maybe maintain your caloric intake. Increasing it because "exercise makes me hungry" is not helping.
Just because your house is clean in areas that other people visit does not make you an excellent housekeeper. Please stop patting yourself on the back and go wade through the mess in a bedroom or two.
You might not want to ingest so much caffeine, like, ever again. If scientists were to come to the house and measure seismic activity the shakes from your body alone would produce a 3.6 on the Richter scale.
It's great you put Spawnling's baby clothes into some giveaway bags. Now you might want to actually give them away. That's what you're supposed to do with giveaway bags and not leave them in the hallway for months at a time.
Reading. It's good for you. Try doing more of it. Staring at your 'to read' pile of books does not actually count as reading.
While we're on the subject, Facebook does not count as reading either. It doesn't. Not even a little bit.
Oh, and the pile of art supplies sleeping on your printer? Works of art don't create themselves. There is no self-discovery in thinking about painting. Nice try.
Never, ever switch both your shampoo and hair styling product at the same time again. Frizzy disaster! They could make a B movie out of your hair right now. The Thing That Ate The Maven!! Your head currently has its own continent. Brutal.
Know what? Despite your faults you're actually a really cool chick. It's important to balance all that nitpicking with a compliment or two. You're also intelligent, funny, and dead sexy. You know, if we're going to be throwing around compliments. Go big or go home.
It's time to go do something productive. But before that happens can you please finally post links to the interviews you gave? Procrastination is definitely one of your superpowers, Maven.
Impossible M.O.M. - She knows exactly what she'd ask George W. Bush.
Nat - She lets us in on what a proper robot helper should look like.
Mary P. Jones - She reveals what Muppet she'd give a rose to.
Jobthingy - She ponders what kind of Starbucks drink she'd design.
Anybeth - She shares her top three 80's songs.
Momma - She designs a parade float that best resembles her life.
Jen - She changes one thing about life in Russia (Yes, Jen. Just one.)
(If I forgot that I interviewed you please remind me, and do understand that I am terribly busy and extremely popular coupled with the fact that I fried many braincells in my early, non-recovery days. Thank you.)
Cookies will not make you skinny.
Exercise only works if you actually reduce or maybe maintain your caloric intake. Increasing it because "exercise makes me hungry" is not helping.
Just because your house is clean in areas that other people visit does not make you an excellent housekeeper. Please stop patting yourself on the back and go wade through the mess in a bedroom or two.
You might not want to ingest so much caffeine, like, ever again. If scientists were to come to the house and measure seismic activity the shakes from your body alone would produce a 3.6 on the Richter scale.
It's great you put Spawnling's baby clothes into some giveaway bags. Now you might want to actually give them away. That's what you're supposed to do with giveaway bags and not leave them in the hallway for months at a time.
Reading. It's good for you. Try doing more of it. Staring at your 'to read' pile of books does not actually count as reading.
While we're on the subject, Facebook does not count as reading either. It doesn't. Not even a little bit.
Oh, and the pile of art supplies sleeping on your printer? Works of art don't create themselves. There is no self-discovery in thinking about painting. Nice try.
Never, ever switch both your shampoo and hair styling product at the same time again. Frizzy disaster! They could make a B movie out of your hair right now. The Thing That Ate The Maven!! Your head currently has its own continent. Brutal.
Know what? Despite your faults you're actually a really cool chick. It's important to balance all that nitpicking with a compliment or two. You're also intelligent, funny, and dead sexy. You know, if we're going to be throwing around compliments. Go big or go home.
It's time to go do something productive. But before that happens can you please finally post links to the interviews you gave? Procrastination is definitely one of your superpowers, Maven.
Impossible M.O.M. - She knows exactly what she'd ask George W. Bush.
Nat - She lets us in on what a proper robot helper should look like.
Mary P. Jones - She reveals what Muppet she'd give a rose to.
Jobthingy - She ponders what kind of Starbucks drink she'd design.
Anybeth - She shares her top three 80's songs.
Momma - She designs a parade float that best resembles her life.
Jen - She changes one thing about life in Russia (Yes, Jen. Just one.)
(If I forgot that I interviewed you please remind me, and do understand that I am terribly busy and extremely popular coupled with the fact that I fried many braincells in my early, non-recovery days. Thank you.)